I made an observation earlier today that this particular time of the year is always quite emotional and transforming for me. Last year was a perfect storm of incidents that changed the trajectory of my life by decisions I made, for better or worse. This year I'm not so much making decisions but rather having them made for me, so to speak. Well, I do have a small choice of whether or not to fight in this particular situation, but I can't see what good it would do. Why waste energy on something you know won't happen? It's not that I am simply being pessimistic--I'm finally being realistic. I am finally waking up to how things are and coming to the "decision" of letting go. In this surrender, I hope to find strength even though right now all I can see is my own weakness.
So despite my brokenness, I vow to move forward and find the happiness that surrounds me here. This can be a much needed nudge back onto my yoga mat or encourage me to get over my fears and attend the Theology on Tap meeting Thursday night. I must learn to let go of the past, be present now, and look with hope to the future.